Back in May, I wrote about Bloomington's resident coot, David R. Grubb, who's currently in jail for hitting a small child who wouldn't take candy from him.
Bloomington's Cable Access Television Station, CATS, at one time was the home of the early 90's slacker TV phenomenon that was J&B on the Rox, later just Rox, but mostly it's a county-government-level C-SPAN, broadcasting local government meetings, including meetings where Mr. Grubb flexed his oratorial muscles during the public comment segments, railing against Greed, Crud, and Fraud.
A few months ago, somebody known as 50YearRanger posted a series of 9 of Grubb's appearances during 2004 on YouTube, as 'The Grubb Files'. In the series you can see Grubb's gradual transformation from not particularly bad-looking old Midwestern dude with actually not a bad voice (in a different, better life, he might have narrated 'The Dukes Of Hazard') to a grubby (sorry) mountain man figure, complete with a leaf hanging from his beard in Episode 8: We Don't Need Michigan. I found out about this via Bloomington's 'Herald-Times', in an article last Sunday about this cool new thing called YouTube.
A couple notes for viewers from outside Monroe County:
Jeff Ellington, who Grubb attacks in Episodes 2 and 3, owns Ellington Stables, the home for PALS (People, animals, learning services) which is a facility specializing in therapuetic horse riding for individuals with special needs. So he'd appear not to be such a bad guy.
Bill Cook, who Grubb refers to as a 'taker' in Episode 7, Seduced By a Devil Worshipper, is Bloomington's benevolent billionaire, founder of Cook Inc, a company that makes medical devices. Cook is known for his generosity, including a $600,000 donation to a free medical clinic, and a $1 million donation to COPS, a charity for the families of police officers killed in the line of duty. Both of these donations are very recent examples, and there are many more.
Monday, October 23, 2006
Friday, October 13, 2006
We got robbed on the Nobel Peace Prize!
The gloomy Guses who wring their hands with their sob story about Americans can't compete in Science had to give it a rest for a while with this year's Nobel Prizes, when 6 Americans were awarded the prizes for medicine, physics, chemistry, and economics, and we dominated the awards like we do the Super Bowl and World Series. Then the dark cloud came back when we were denied a sweep, with some Turkish guy getting the literature prize, and the Nobel Peace Prize going to Bangladeshi economist Muhammed Yunus and his Grameen bank, which gives innovative micro-loans to entrepreneurs, which has the effect of lifting the bank's customers out of poverty. By reducing poverty, they create a more secure and as a result peaceful society. As it happens, the bank makes money, too, turning a profit in all but 3 years since its creation in 1976.
It hurts that this prize could not go to an American. When Yunus says "They're not asking for charity, charity is no solution to poverty", he sounds almost like a College Republican reciting the right-wing saw: "a hand up, not a hand out". Further, in America, companies like Cash King, Cash One, CheckMate, EZLoans, Money Mart, and Check'n'Go have been making small 'PayDay loans' to poor people for years. Poor Christian people wanting to borrow money from fellow Christians can go to Christian Faith Financial.
Of course, there are some differences between Grameen Bank and the typical Payday Loan franchise. Grameen Bank requires borrowers to belong to five member groups, so there is a motivation to pay back the loan to avoid the shame of having the other people in your group know you are a deadbeat. Also, according to the website: "Since the bank does not wish to take any borrower to the court of law in case of non-repayment, it does not require the borrowers to sign any legal instrument." Payday Loan companies threaten jail time as a way of collecting debts. Grameen offers interest rates of 20%, 8%, 5%, and a rate of 0% for 'Struggling Members'. Payday loan interest rates average just under 400%, although thanks to a measure passed by House and Senate Republicans that has nothing to do with the fact that Election Day is right around the corner, there is now a 36% cap on payday loans for service members and their spouses.
"We need to enact these new protections for our troops and their families because a growing predatory lending problem has impacted our operational readiness,"said Sen. Jim Talent, R-Mo., who pushed the measure in the Senate.
So, apparently by preying on the poor and increasing poverty, Payday loans cripple the U.S. military and threaten our readiness to go out and start wars. If that's the case, why can't whoever it was that started 'Check'n'Go' get the Nobel Peace Prize? If he's American, I mean.
It hurts that this prize could not go to an American. When Yunus says "They're not asking for charity, charity is no solution to poverty", he sounds almost like a College Republican reciting the right-wing saw: "a hand up, not a hand out". Further, in America, companies like Cash King, Cash One, CheckMate, EZLoans, Money Mart, and Check'n'Go have been making small 'PayDay loans' to poor people for years. Poor Christian people wanting to borrow money from fellow Christians can go to Christian Faith Financial.
Of course, there are some differences between Grameen Bank and the typical Payday Loan franchise. Grameen Bank requires borrowers to belong to five member groups, so there is a motivation to pay back the loan to avoid the shame of having the other people in your group know you are a deadbeat. Also, according to the website: "Since the bank does not wish to take any borrower to the court of law in case of non-repayment, it does not require the borrowers to sign any legal instrument." Payday Loan companies threaten jail time as a way of collecting debts. Grameen offers interest rates of 20%, 8%, 5%, and a rate of 0% for 'Struggling Members'. Payday loan interest rates average just under 400%, although thanks to a measure passed by House and Senate Republicans that has nothing to do with the fact that Election Day is right around the corner, there is now a 36% cap on payday loans for service members and their spouses.
"We need to enact these new protections for our troops and their families because a growing predatory lending problem has impacted our operational readiness,"said Sen. Jim Talent, R-Mo., who pushed the measure in the Senate.
So, apparently by preying on the poor and increasing poverty, Payday loans cripple the U.S. military and threaten our readiness to go out and start wars. If that's the case, why can't whoever it was that started 'Check'n'Go' get the Nobel Peace Prize? If he's American, I mean.
Tuesday, September 19, 2006
So I have to write about the dog shit brownies
So anyway, I got this email from my sister, it was one of those chain inspirational emails, and it was about some kids that wanted to see a dirty movie, and their dad teaches them a lesson by painstakingly baking them brownies with dog shit mixed in.
It turns out the source is Danae Dobson, daughter of James 'Focus on The Family' Dobson. I fou nd this out from the 'Shakespeare's Sister' blog. The entry is from 2004, so these things just don't die apparently, they float around wasting precious email server resources and disk space forever, a tragic misuse of technology rivaling the 'Benson' marathons they always seem to be having on the 'TVLand' Channel (also a tragic waste).
Now's a good time to listen to The Evolution Control Committee's 'Acid Family', which chops up and re-assembles some Focus on The Family propaganda tape.
As a father, I have had moments where my daughter has frustrated me, but I certainly can't imagine going out in the back yard, or maybe a nearby park, collecting dog shit, making brownies, mashing the shit so it's not in big clumps, then mixing it in with the brownie mix, then baking these brownies nobody is going to eat, just so I can have some grand 'wisdom of Solomon' moment where I teach my kids profanity is wrong (but apparently, wasting precious food is A-OK). Anyhow, there probably was no shit in the brownies, the Dad was just lying. What a fucking hypocrite. All his daughters are gonna grow up to be crack hoes for sure. Perhaps in an ironic twist, one will star in 'Copro Hoes VIII - Dog Shit Day Afternoon'
It's also curious to note that there is shit in a lot of our food. I recall reading about regulations as to how many insect parts or how much rodent excrement is allowable in peanut butter, things like that. You can also Google around and find stories like this about our food being fed shit:
Britain Seeks Stricter Beef Labels. Britain's Agriculture Minister Nick Brown says he will order stricter labeling on meat following a European Union report that accuses French rendering plants of using sewage in livestock feed. Brown says it is "a pretty horrible and disgusting thing" to use human and animal excrement in animal food. "I am going to tighten up the labeling rules...to be more explicit than we are now," says Brown.
As Bruce Willis points out in the film Fast Food Nation: "We all have to eat shit once in a while". So I guess Dad's point is invalid. No matter what we do, the world isn't perfect. Even George 'Direct Line To God' Bush acknowledges that you may get some arsenic in your water, and too bad, that's just the way the world is. In fact, I believe what he and his people said was something along the lines of 'stop whining, it's a small amount, it won't kill you'. So too, people aren't pure or perfect. Life isn't pure or perfect. Pretend otherwise or expect otherwise and before you know it you're carrying a backpack full of explosives into the market, with not dog shit but nails mixed in.
And now, to further the tragic waste, is the story:
It turns out the source is Danae Dobson, daughter of James 'Focus on The Family' Dobson. I fou nd this out from the 'Shakespeare's Sister' blog. The entry is from 2004, so these things just don't die apparently, they float around wasting precious email server resources and disk space forever, a tragic misuse of technology rivaling the 'Benson' marathons they always seem to be having on the 'TVLand' Channel (also a tragic waste).
Now's a good time to listen to The Evolution Control Committee's 'Acid Family', which chops up and re-assembles some Focus on The Family propaganda tape.
As a father, I have had moments where my daughter has frustrated me, but I certainly can't imagine going out in the back yard, or maybe a nearby park, collecting dog shit, making brownies, mashing the shit so it's not in big clumps, then mixing it in with the brownie mix, then baking these brownies nobody is going to eat, just so I can have some grand 'wisdom of Solomon' moment where I teach my kids profanity is wrong (but apparently, wasting precious food is A-OK). Anyhow, there probably was no shit in the brownies, the Dad was just lying. What a fucking hypocrite. All his daughters are gonna grow up to be crack hoes for sure. Perhaps in an ironic twist, one will star in 'Copro Hoes VIII - Dog Shit Day Afternoon'
It's also curious to note that there is shit in a lot of our food. I recall reading about regulations as to how many insect parts or how much rodent excrement is allowable in peanut butter, things like that. You can also Google around and find stories like this about our food being fed shit:
Britain Seeks Stricter Beef Labels. Britain's Agriculture Minister Nick Brown says he will order stricter labeling on meat following a European Union report that accuses French rendering plants of using sewage in livestock feed. Brown says it is "a pretty horrible and disgusting thing" to use human and animal excrement in animal food. "I am going to tighten up the labeling rules...to be more explicit than we are now," says Brown.
As Bruce Willis points out in the film Fast Food Nation: "We all have to eat shit once in a while". So I guess Dad's point is invalid. No matter what we do, the world isn't perfect. Even George 'Direct Line To God' Bush acknowledges that you may get some arsenic in your water, and too bad, that's just the way the world is. In fact, I believe what he and his people said was something along the lines of 'stop whining, it's a small amount, it won't kill you'. So too, people aren't pure or perfect. Life isn't pure or perfect. Pretend otherwise or expect otherwise and before you know it you're carrying a backpack full of explosives into the market, with not dog shit but nails mixed in.
And now, to further the tragic waste, is the story:
Not long ago I became interested in foreign films. I began renting various titles, selecting those that had been applauded by the critics. Not surprisingly, I found some of the videos pretty trashy. The Lord brought one word to my mind: discretion. I was not exercising good judgment when renting these foreign films; I needed to be more discerning.
You might be asking, "What's the big deal, anyway? It's only entertainment-why does it matter what we expose ourselves to?" Let me try to explain with a story.
A father of three teenagers set a rule that the family could not watch R-rated movies. This created a problem when a certain popular movie opened in local theaters. All the teens were bent on seeing the film, despite its "R" rating.
The teens interviewed friends and even members of their church to compile a list of pros and cons about the movie. They hoped that the list would convince their dad that they should be allowed to attend.
The cons were that it contained only a few swear words that misused God's name, only one act of violence ("which you can see on TV all the time," they said), and only one sex scene (and it was mostly implied sex, off camera).
The pros were that it was a popular movie-a blockbuster. If the teens saw the movie, then they would not feel left out when their friends discussed it. The movie contained a good plot and two hours of nonstop action and suspense. There were fantastic special effects! The movie also featured some of the most talented actors in Hollywood. The teens were certain that the film would be nominated for several awards. And Christian friends at their church who had seen the movie said it wasn't "that bad." Therefore, since there were more pros than cons, the teens asked their father to reconsider his position just this once.
The father looked at the list and asked if he could have a day to think about it before making his decision. The teens were thrilled. Now we've got him! they thought. Our argument is too good! Dad can't turn us down! So they agreed to give him a day to think about their request.
The next day the father called his three teenagers, who were smiling smugly, into the living room. They were puzzled to see a plate of brownies on the coffee table. The father said he had decided that if they would eat a brownie, then he would let them go to the movie. But just like the movie, the brownies had pros and cons.
The pros were that they had been made with fresh walnuts and the finest chocolate. These moist frosted brownies had been created with an award-winning recipe. Best of all, they had been made with care by the hands of the teens' own father.
The brownies had only one con. They had a little bit of dog poop in them. But the dough had been mixed well-the teens probably would not even be able to taste it. And their father had baked the brownies at 350 degrees, so any bacteria or germs had probably been destroyed. Therefore, if any of his children could stand to eat a brownie that included "just a little bit of poop," then they also would be permitted to see the movie with "just a little bit of smut." By now the teens had lost their smug expressions. They turned down the tainted brownies, and only Dad was smiling smugly as they left the room.
Now when his teenagers ask permission to do something he is opposed to, the father just asks, "Would you like me to whip up a batch of my special brownies?"
You might be asking, "What's the big deal, anyway? It's only entertainment-why does it matter what we expose ourselves to?" Let me try to explain with a story.
A father of three teenagers set a rule that the family could not watch R-rated movies. This created a problem when a certain popular movie opened in local theaters. All the teens were bent on seeing the film, despite its "R" rating.
The teens interviewed friends and even members of their church to compile a list of pros and cons about the movie. They hoped that the list would convince their dad that they should be allowed to attend.
The cons were that it contained only a few swear words that misused God's name, only one act of violence ("which you can see on TV all the time," they said), and only one sex scene (and it was mostly implied sex, off camera).
The pros were that it was a popular movie-a blockbuster. If the teens saw the movie, then they would not feel left out when their friends discussed it. The movie contained a good plot and two hours of nonstop action and suspense. There were fantastic special effects! The movie also featured some of the most talented actors in Hollywood. The teens were certain that the film would be nominated for several awards. And Christian friends at their church who had seen the movie said it wasn't "that bad." Therefore, since there were more pros than cons, the teens asked their father to reconsider his position just this once.
The father looked at the list and asked if he could have a day to think about it before making his decision. The teens were thrilled. Now we've got him! they thought. Our argument is too good! Dad can't turn us down! So they agreed to give him a day to think about their request.
The next day the father called his three teenagers, who were smiling smugly, into the living room. They were puzzled to see a plate of brownies on the coffee table. The father said he had decided that if they would eat a brownie, then he would let them go to the movie. But just like the movie, the brownies had pros and cons.
The pros were that they had been made with fresh walnuts and the finest chocolate. These moist frosted brownies had been created with an award-winning recipe. Best of all, they had been made with care by the hands of the teens' own father.
The brownies had only one con. They had a little bit of dog poop in them. But the dough had been mixed well-the teens probably would not even be able to taste it. And their father had baked the brownies at 350 degrees, so any bacteria or germs had probably been destroyed. Therefore, if any of his children could stand to eat a brownie that included "just a little bit of poop," then they also would be permitted to see the movie with "just a little bit of smut." By now the teens had lost their smug expressions. They turned down the tainted brownies, and only Dad was smiling smugly as they left the room.
Now when his teenagers ask permission to do something he is opposed to, the father just asks, "Would you like me to whip up a batch of my special brownies?"
Friday, September 15, 2006
Each of us brings our own special ignorance to the table
It's been observed that back in the day (the early 80's), you could pretty much know everything there is to know about the Apple ][e. You didn't even have to necessarily be Steve Wozniak. The Commodore 64 Programmer's Reference Guide came in at under 500 pages.
Well,apparently you couldn't get 'Hello World' in J2EE in under 500 pages these days. And that's just the beginning. Once you know everything there is to know about programming, or at least have fully mastered Java (not just core Java but JMS, JSP, JAX, JNDI and Hibernate and JSF and JKE and JRP and cetera), C++, Python, Ruby and probably thrown in a good mindfuck language like Haskell or, why not, Brainfuck, you will still be regarded as a fucktard by the DBA where you work. And best to steer cleer of the Network Engineers altogether, is my advice to you.
You will have your hands full explaining to the non techy types why you can't fix their printer (leaving out that if you could you wouldn't because you ain't the help desk, dammit), because odds are saying 'I dunno how to do that' while wearing a practiced expression that just radiates ignorance and obliviousness is just plain not an option.
(a really old draft)
Well,apparently you couldn't get 'Hello World' in J2EE in under 500 pages these days. And that's just the beginning. Once you know everything there is to know about programming, or at least have fully mastered Java (not just core Java but JMS, JSP, JAX, JNDI and Hibernate and JSF and JKE and JRP and cetera), C++, Python, Ruby and probably thrown in a good mindfuck language like Haskell or, why not, Brainfuck, you will still be regarded as a fucktard by the DBA where you work. And best to steer cleer of the Network Engineers altogether, is my advice to you.
You will have your hands full explaining to the non techy types why you can't fix their printer (leaving out that if you could you wouldn't because you ain't the help desk, dammit), because odds are saying 'I dunno how to do that' while wearing a practiced expression that just radiates ignorance and obliviousness is just plain not an option.
(a really old draft)
Tuesday, September 12, 2006
Martin Amis On the Spraying of Hair, Blood and Bone Fragments
Amidst the almost robotic by-the-numbers treatment of the 5th anniversary of Sept. 11, this was worth reading: "The age of horrorism". Amis goes into much greater details on Qutb's disgust with the Americans he encountered in the 1949 Sodom of the dry Greeley, CO, and closes with this quote from Joseph Conrad which sums things up beautifully:
'The world of the living contains enough marvels and mysteries as it is - marvels and mysteries acting upon our emotions and intelligence in ways so inexplicable that it would almost justify the conception of life as an enchanted state. No, I am too firm in my consciousness of the marvellous to be ever fascinated by the mere supernatural, which (take it any way you like) is but a manufactured article, the fabrication of minds insensitive to the intimate delicacies of our relation to the dead and to the living, in their countless multitudes; a desecration of our tenderest memories; an outrage on our dignity.
'The world of the living contains enough marvels and mysteries as it is - marvels and mysteries acting upon our emotions and intelligence in ways so inexplicable that it would almost justify the conception of life as an enchanted state. No, I am too firm in my consciousness of the marvellous to be ever fascinated by the mere supernatural, which (take it any way you like) is but a manufactured article, the fabrication of minds insensitive to the intimate delicacies of our relation to the dead and to the living, in their countless multitudes; a desecration of our tenderest memories; an outrage on our dignity.
'Whatever my native modesty may be it will never condescend to seek help for my imagination within those vain imaginings common to all ages and that in themselves are enough to fill all lovers of mankind with unutterable sadness.' ('Author's Note' to The Shadow-Line, 1920.)
Next time: more goofy shit!Thursday, September 07, 2006
Random Toughts In The Larry King Vein - The Political Edition
It must really suck to lose your job these days, via layoff or even your own overwhelming incompetence, and then see Donald Rumsfeld on the TV just cruising along, everyday outsucking himself.
Ahmadinejad is the embodiment of evil and all that, yet on TV he mostly looks like a creep working at Radio Shack wearing a Members Only jacket.
I saw an interview on TV with a top guy from Hamas, and he was very charming, articulate, immaculately dressed - he almost made you forget his job was to convince confused adolescents to spray hair, blood and bone fragments all over Israeli pizza places.
Sayyid Qutb thought Americans were shallow and soul-less because of their pre-occupation with lawn care, and I guess I can kind of see that. But he also hated Americans for our haircuts, and I think we can compete with any nation, hair-wise.
Ahmadinejad is the embodiment of evil and all that, yet on TV he mostly looks like a creep working at Radio Shack wearing a Members Only jacket.
I saw an interview on TV with a top guy from Hamas, and he was very charming, articulate, immaculately dressed - he almost made you forget his job was to convince confused adolescents to spray hair, blood and bone fragments all over Israeli pizza places.
Sayyid Qutb thought Americans were shallow and soul-less because of their pre-occupation with lawn care, and I guess I can kind of see that. But he also hated Americans for our haircuts, and I think we can compete with any nation, hair-wise.
Wednesday, August 30, 2006
Passive Consumer of Entertainment Product: The $1 CD Rack at TD's CD's and LP's
There was a time I could afford at most one new CD a week. That time is gone, but that doesn't mean I should ignore the $1 CD Rack at TD's, esp. since the job where I could buy (usually mainstream) CDs for $2.50 is a distant memory now. Anyhow, here's what I found last week:
- Lionrock, City Delirious
- Kruder and Dorfmeister, G-Stoned EP
- Various, CMJ Presents Certain Damage vol 13
G-Stoned has a cover that's an obvious parody of or homage to Simon and Garfunkel's Bookends, something people who like both K&D and S&G (like me) were quick to notice. But there are no interviews with the elderly to be found on this CD, just that 'yuppie chillout music' that K&D built a career out of. It's not bad, but it's no Rude Boy Rock.
Finally we have the CMJ Volume 13 album, which I bought because there was a Faith Healers song I had never heard on it. Imagine my disappointment on finding this was the Faith Healers from Arkansas, not the ones from the UK that did the very noisy, repetitive but oddly hippie-ish music in the early 90's. The presence of Tone-Loc and Slick Rick tells us this CD dates from the late 80's. The presence of the Fall was no help in determining what year this came out, as they have been around forever. A hip-hop song from the forgotten 'Big Lady K' uses a James Brown sample, forgotten group S.K.A.M. contributes the song 'We Didn't Even Need James', as in 'we didn't need a James Brown sample to make this song', but maybe they did need James (or, like Tone-Loc, Van Halen), to keep from dropping off the face of the earth completely.
All in all, not a bad use of $3, or of the brief time I spent after my visit to the Laughing Planet Cafe upstairs for a burrito.
Saturday, August 26, 2006
Who can('t) end racism with his smile?
When I was in college, I had this friend who, like me, was into hip hop. This was ca. 1989, a very good year for hip hop (Public Enemy, Boogie Down Productions, De La Soul, Yo! MTV Raps!, all of that and more). We also liked Spike Lee's movies (esp. 'Do The Right Thing', which as the song notes came out in 1989, the summer). We were both from whiter-than-white towns (Danville, IN and Brownsburg, IN). My friend was attending Purdue University, and in the spirit of promoting racial harmony and combating racism he decided he was gonna say 'Hi' to every black person he saw. Not all the black people enthusiastically said 'Hi' back. He was very disillusioned and shortly after that he started listening to Rush Limbaugh. He also later was about as cold about Biggie Smalls' death as Ted Nugent was about Kurt Cobain's, if that's possible.
Anyhow, around the time he started getting all disillusioned, as an experiment, I spent a day saying 'Hi' to every white person I saw, and that didn't go too well either. Try it yourself!
I grew up across the street from a kid who became a 'non-racist' skinhead, and would learn that 'non-racist' is skinhead slang for 'just homophobic'. It's kind of like how some vegetarians eat eggs, but others don't. Don't go around assuming vegetarians aren't eating eggs. Apparently at one time skinheads were working-class youth that liked ska music and wore funny little hats. Then some old racist dudes with funny little hats infiltrated skinheadism and twisted it, or something, and from that point on skinheads spent the time they used to spend listening to ska explaining the difference between racist and non-racist skinheads, and telling people which kind they were, after which the explainee would make a joke like 'ha ha, non-racist skinhead, is that like a non-rock punk?'. Google for details.
Prior to the head shaving and gay-bashing, he showed signs of being intelligent, which just goes to show 'he seems intelligent' is about as nebulous and pointless and generally worthless a statement as 'he seems nice'.
This has nothing to do with anything but I am old and like to ramble on with the stories.
One time, we tried using a railroad crossing as a Dukes of Hazzard type ramp in winter, and we flipped over the car.
Anyhow, around the time he started getting all disillusioned, as an experiment, I spent a day saying 'Hi' to every white person I saw, and that didn't go too well either. Try it yourself!
I grew up across the street from a kid who became a 'non-racist' skinhead, and would learn that 'non-racist' is skinhead slang for 'just homophobic'. It's kind of like how some vegetarians eat eggs, but others don't. Don't go around assuming vegetarians aren't eating eggs. Apparently at one time skinheads were working-class youth that liked ska music and wore funny little hats. Then some old racist dudes with funny little hats infiltrated skinheadism and twisted it, or something, and from that point on skinheads spent the time they used to spend listening to ska explaining the difference between racist and non-racist skinheads, and telling people which kind they were, after which the explainee would make a joke like 'ha ha, non-racist skinhead, is that like a non-rock punk?'. Google for details.
Prior to the head shaving and gay-bashing, he showed signs of being intelligent, which just goes to show 'he seems intelligent' is about as nebulous and pointless and generally worthless a statement as 'he seems nice'.
This has nothing to do with anything but I am old and like to ramble on with the stories.
One time, we tried using a railroad crossing as a Dukes of Hazzard type ramp in winter, and we flipped over the car.
Thursday, August 17, 2006
Comix 'n' Scabies at Boxcar Books
Before my vacation to Lake Michigan I was in Boxcar Books getting some reading material. They were having a meeting of the Midwest Pages To Prisoners group. They give books to prisoners so they'll have something to do other than shank each other or sex each other up or just spend all their time lifting weights (or waiting for the really big guys to finish lifting weights). OK, all I 'know' about prison I learned from watching the HBO show OZ, plus 'Midnight Express' when I was a kid, up to the point where the 2 dudes start kissing, which is when my parents turned it off.
There was a guy with long hair and an interesting beard talking to one of the tattooed girls near the cash register. I wasn't really paying attention until 'I have scabies, but it's not active now'. Then I think he asked her for money. All she had to say to him was 'I'm sorry, I can't help you', and shortly after he left.
I got really uncomfortable, wondering if he'd passed on inactive scabies to me. Maybe it would lie dormant, just waiting until I was old and weak, at which point it would flare up. I might even be suffering from the diabeetus, like Wilfred Brimley, and the scabies would be the straw that broke the camel's back, last nail in the coffin, all that.
I picked these up:
I read them all (except the Comics Journal, I skimmed it).
I read this book, which largely has a 'it's a rough and tumble world out there, Data Warehousing ain't no game, son, you best knuckle down and get ready for some pain' tone which was off-putting, but I need to know about this stuff.
I read this book, which was a nice where-are-they-now follow up to Louis Theroux's old 'Weird Weekends' show.
The books were rung up by a friendly young woman with interestingly colored hair and a very detailed, black and white photo like tattoo of Niezsche on her arm.
That's it for now, gotta keep the entries short as in brief (to work on next - more frequently as in often).
There was a guy with long hair and an interesting beard talking to one of the tattooed girls near the cash register. I wasn't really paying attention until 'I have scabies, but it's not active now'. Then I think he asked her for money. All she had to say to him was 'I'm sorry, I can't help you', and shortly after he left.
I got really uncomfortable, wondering if he'd passed on inactive scabies to me. Maybe it would lie dormant, just waiting until I was old and weak, at which point it would flare up. I might even be suffering from the diabeetus, like Wilfred Brimley, and the scabies would be the straw that broke the camel's back, last nail in the coffin, all that.
I picked these up:
- Fuzz and Pluck by Ted Stearn (via the inarticulate starving-to-death-monkey Stearn mocks ascetics and mystics, who probably aren't a big chunk of Fantagraphics' readership)
- Found #4 (aka 'Come into our World')
- The Comics Journal (requires you to give a shit about details of the industry more than I do, but did tip me off to potentially interesting books)
- The Believer (again introducing me to books/writers/artists I've never heard of, but suddenly find very interesting, for example: Marjane Satrapi)
I read them all (except the Comics Journal, I skimmed it).
I read this book, which largely has a 'it's a rough and tumble world out there, Data Warehousing ain't no game, son, you best knuckle down and get ready for some pain' tone which was off-putting, but I need to know about this stuff.
I read this book, which was a nice where-are-they-now follow up to Louis Theroux's old 'Weird Weekends' show.
The books were rung up by a friendly young woman with interestingly colored hair and a very detailed, black and white photo like tattoo of Niezsche on her arm.
That's it for now, gotta keep the entries short as in brief (to work on next - more frequently as in often).
Monday, July 31, 2006
Fun Facts about Limerick, Ireland
Limerick is called Stab City because criminals there have to resort to using knives as guns are not as readily available as they are here in the U.S.
Limerick has nothing to do with the 5-line poems of the same name.
In Limerick, they have professional darts on TV EVERY NIGHT!
The Gaelic translation of 'Arnold Schwarzeneggar' is 'Arnold Schwarzeneggar'.
Between April 15 1919 and April 27 1919 the city faced a not unsuccessful period of self-rule which was called the Limerick Soviet.
There are a lot of Polish immigrants in Limerick, who do not like the local food.
Guiness does in fact taste different in Limerick.
I am told Budweiser also tastes different in Limerick, but I did not try to verify this.
People in Limerick are very polite, and don't go on about what a moron George Bush is until you first signal to them that you think George Bush is a fucking moron.
More later!
Limerick has nothing to do with the 5-line poems of the same name.
In Limerick, they have professional darts on TV EVERY NIGHT!
The Gaelic translation of 'Arnold Schwarzeneggar' is 'Arnold Schwarzeneggar'.
Between April 15 1919 and April 27 1919 the city faced a not unsuccessful period of self-rule which was called the Limerick Soviet.
There are a lot of Polish immigrants in Limerick, who do not like the local food.
Guiness does in fact taste different in Limerick.
I am told Budweiser also tastes different in Limerick, but I did not try to verify this.
People in Limerick are very polite, and don't go on about what a moron George Bush is until you first signal to them that you think George Bush is a fucking moron.
More later!
Saturday, July 15, 2006
Each of us brings our own special ignorance to the table
It's been observed that back in the day (the early 80's), you could pretty much know everything there is to know about the Apple ][e. You didn't even have to necessarily be Steve Wozniak. The Commodore 64 Programmer's Reference Guide came in at under 500 pages.
Well,apparently you couldn't get 'Hello World' in J2EE in under 500 pages these days. And that's just the beginning. Once you know everything there is to know about programming, or at least have fully mastered Java (not just core Java but JMS, JSP, JAX, JNDI and Hibernate and JSF and JKE and JRP and cetera), C++, Python, Ruby and probably thrown in a good mindfuck language like Haskell or, why not, Brainfuck, you will still be regarded as a fucktard by the DBA where you work. And best to steer cleer of the Network Engineers altogether, is my advice to you.
You will have your hands full explaining to the non techy types why you can't fix their printer (leaving out that if you could you wouldn't because you ain't the help desk, dammit), because odds are saying 'I dunno how to do that' while wearing a practiced expression that just radiates ignorance and obliviousness is just plain not an option.
Well,apparently you couldn't get 'Hello World' in J2EE in under 500 pages these days. And that's just the beginning. Once you know everything there is to know about programming, or at least have fully mastered Java (not just core Java but JMS, JSP, JAX, JNDI and Hibernate and JSF and JKE and JRP and cetera), C++, Python, Ruby and probably thrown in a good mindfuck language like Haskell or, why not, Brainfuck, you will still be regarded as a fucktard by the DBA where you work. And best to steer cleer of the Network Engineers altogether, is my advice to you.
You will have your hands full explaining to the non techy types why you can't fix their printer (leaving out that if you could you wouldn't because you ain't the help desk, dammit), because odds are saying 'I dunno how to do that' while wearing a practiced expression that just radiates ignorance and obliviousness is just plain not an option.
Wednesday, July 05, 2006
Punks Over 40 and Still above Room Temperature
I found the early '92 (it's missing the front page) 'Punks Over 30 And Still Giving a Shit' issue of Maximum Rock 'n' Roll in the garage recently. It makes for an interesting window into the pre-internets, pre Green Day as background music on a Seinfeld clip show days of punk.
Within, youngsters are asked what they predict they'll be doing when they're 30 (then 17-yo Nicole Gonzalez: "Hopefully I'll be a singer of a really cool punk band, and I'll be, like, not rich, but not poor, just well off"), whether they'd fuck a punk who's over 30 (Tait, age 20: "Why does MRR always ask such vapid questions, when its readers are intelligent enough to answer more important questions?"), and then there's the main feature article, where prominent scene-type-people over (or at least close to) 30 are interviewed.
In the interest of science, with Google at my disposal, I tried to see if I could figure out what happened to some of these people.
Tom Pig, 33, Guitarist, Poison Idea
Quote from interview: "I always had a fairly questioning mind, was always curious. I was trying to find out why I am so fucked out, why do I hate my parents and why do they hate me, why I can't get along with anybody - so I had to start reading books to find out what was wrong. My quest. Also, taking massive amounts of LSD, multiple hundreds of hits - I was out there, trying to figure things out".
Where is he now?
Found dead, Feb 1, 2006, of kidney failure
Blew out my flip flop
Stepped on a pop-top
Dave Dictor, 36, Singer/Lyricist, MDC
MDC stood for 'Millions of Dead Cops' or 'Millions of Dead Children', depending on who's amateur leather jacket art you were looking at.
Quote:
"One thing I don't do anymore is skateboarding. Falling down and hurting myself. I gave away my skateboard".
Where is he now?
Still with MDC, as is the rest of the band. You can read about them on the internets.
This week on Rock Star: INXS
G.G. Allin, 35, Singer(sic)
/Lyricist(sic)
Infamous for live shows featuring cutting himself up and defecating on the stage - pretty standard MTV stuff these days thanks to Johnny Knoxville. For a while he kept promising/threatening to kill himself onstage when he turned 30, but like pretty much everybody else he chose to get in a rut and turned into a parody of himself instead.
Quote: "Going to prison...was a learning experience for me that made me a better criminal"
Where is he now?
Dead, dead, dead. Heroin overdose following a show.
I didn't go to art school,
but my wife did.
Thurston Moore, 34, Guitarist, Sonic Youth
Quote: "I remember reading an interview with Lou Reed where he said 'I don't make music for kids, I make it for adults'. I was repulsed by that."
Where is he now?
Still guitarist for Sonic Youth, who released an album in June.
Rob Wright, 38, Bass/Guitar/Singer, NoMeansNo
Quote: (When asked 'what's the secret, Rob?') "Starting late and having no hope of doing anything else! It's either this or washing dishes, folks!"
Where is he now?
Continues to give a shit. New album coming out this year. Also a member of The Hanson Brothers.
Steve Spinali, 34, Writer, MRR
Quote:
Steve Spinali: I've been trying to see how my thoughts, actions and beliefs reflect and change outward reality.
Interviewer: Huh! So, can you make the Ramones good again?
SS: There are some things far beyond my ability
Where is he now?
Apparently still kicking. Wrote something in MRR 256, the current one is 278, so that'd be sometime in 2004 I guess.
Sometimes things spring into
existence fully realized.
Joey Ramone, (3?), vocalist, The Ramones:
He and his stage brothers invented punk rock, just like Iggy Pop and the Asheton Brothers and the MC 5 and the Velvet Underground invented punk rock before them. The point being, it was not invented in England.
Quote: "I exercise, actually I've been sober now 2 years. I see a homeopathic chiropractor, and I guess I'm into something different now than I was previously, ya know what I mean?"
Where is he now?
Sadly, no longer with us. Died of lymphoma April 15, 2001.
What have we learned from all this?
Old people are kind of pathetic with the nostalgia, regardless of the youth culture they loosely aligned themselves with in the past.
Within, youngsters are asked what they predict they'll be doing when they're 30 (then 17-yo Nicole Gonzalez: "Hopefully I'll be a singer of a really cool punk band, and I'll be, like, not rich, but not poor, just well off"), whether they'd fuck a punk who's over 30 (Tait, age 20: "Why does MRR always ask such vapid questions, when its readers are intelligent enough to answer more important questions?"), and then there's the main feature article, where prominent scene-type-people over (or at least close to) 30 are interviewed.
In the interest of science, with Google at my disposal, I tried to see if I could figure out what happened to some of these people.
Tom Pig, 33, Guitarist, Poison Idea
Quote from interview: "I always had a fairly questioning mind, was always curious. I was trying to find out why I am so fucked out, why do I hate my parents and why do they hate me, why I can't get along with anybody - so I had to start reading books to find out what was wrong. My quest. Also, taking massive amounts of LSD, multiple hundreds of hits - I was out there, trying to figure things out".
Where is he now?
Found dead, Feb 1, 2006, of kidney failure
Blew out my flip flop
Stepped on a pop-top
Dave Dictor, 36, Singer/Lyricist, MDC
MDC stood for 'Millions of Dead Cops' or 'Millions of Dead Children', depending on who's amateur leather jacket art you were looking at.
Quote:
"One thing I don't do anymore is skateboarding. Falling down and hurting myself. I gave away my skateboard".
Where is he now?
Still with MDC, as is the rest of the band. You can read about them on the internets.
This week on Rock Star: INXS
G.G. Allin, 35, Singer(sic)
/Lyricist(sic)
Infamous for live shows featuring cutting himself up and defecating on the stage - pretty standard MTV stuff these days thanks to Johnny Knoxville. For a while he kept promising/threatening to kill himself onstage when he turned 30, but like pretty much everybody else he chose to get in a rut and turned into a parody of himself instead.
Quote: "Going to prison...was a learning experience for me that made me a better criminal"
Where is he now?
Dead, dead, dead. Heroin overdose following a show.
I didn't go to art school,
but my wife did.
Thurston Moore, 34, Guitarist, Sonic Youth
Quote: "I remember reading an interview with Lou Reed where he said 'I don't make music for kids, I make it for adults'. I was repulsed by that."
Where is he now?
Still guitarist for Sonic Youth, who released an album in June.
Rob Wright, 38, Bass/Guitar/Singer, NoMeansNo
Quote: (When asked 'what's the secret, Rob?') "Starting late and having no hope of doing anything else! It's either this or washing dishes, folks!"
Where is he now?
Continues to give a shit. New album coming out this year. Also a member of The Hanson Brothers.
Steve Spinali, 34, Writer, MRR
Quote:
Steve Spinali: I've been trying to see how my thoughts, actions and beliefs reflect and change outward reality.
Interviewer: Huh! So, can you make the Ramones good again?
SS: There are some things far beyond my ability
Where is he now?
Apparently still kicking. Wrote something in MRR 256, the current one is 278, so that'd be sometime in 2004 I guess.
Sometimes things spring into
existence fully realized.
Joey Ramone, (3?), vocalist, The Ramones:
He and his stage brothers invented punk rock, just like Iggy Pop and the Asheton Brothers and the MC 5 and the Velvet Underground invented punk rock before them. The point being, it was not invented in England.
Quote: "I exercise, actually I've been sober now 2 years. I see a homeopathic chiropractor, and I guess I'm into something different now than I was previously, ya know what I mean?"
Where is he now?
Sadly, no longer with us. Died of lymphoma April 15, 2001.
What have we learned from all this?
Old people are kind of pathetic with the nostalgia, regardless of the youth culture they loosely aligned themselves with in the past.
Saturday, June 24, 2006
Stephen Hawking: Chinese Women Are Hot
Hawking.
At a seminar in Beijing last week, famous physicist Stephen Hawking, who holds the post of Cambridge University's Lucasian Professor of Mathematics once held by the great Sir Isaac Newton, told the audience of 500: "I like Chinese culture, Chinese food and above all Chinese women. They are beautiful." He also said some stuff about global warming potentially destroying the earth.
On hearing the news, the Fundamentalist Scientists of the IDEA club immediately sprung into action, assembling and distributing a list of 'over 500 physicists who prefer white women'. Within hours, the list came under fire in the physics blogosphere, as several physics bloggers or 'blogons', as they are sometimes known, pointed out that many people on the list were not Physicists, but merely people who had taken Physics in High School.
Chinese Woman.
Asked for comment, Sir Mix-a-Lot, who holds the 'Sir' title once held by Isaac Newton, said: "I like big butts, and I won't lie."
Saturday, June 10, 2006
Environment of Non-Compliance - The Kelvin Sampson Story
Sampson.
Gannascoli.
IU fans will want to see this upcoming made-for-TV movie about the new IU basketball coach's experiences at Oklahoma. The title role will be played by Joseph Gannascoli, better known as gangster and Johnny-cake aficionado Vito Spatafore on HBO's The Sopranos.
Thursday, June 08, 2006
I'm Santa Claus, Dammit! (GRUBB UPDATE)
An earlier entry here at words of advice for young people introduced our reader(s) to Monroe County character David Grubb and some of his outsider art.
Recently the man himself has been in the news, as with a story in the June 8, 2006 edition of Bloomington's 'Herald-Times'. I can't link to it, because you have to be a subscriber, so I will just share some excerpts in a manner I hope is consistent with 'fair use'.
One of the most universal and fundamental pieces of advice old folks pass on to the kids is: 'don't take candy from strangers'. It seems some Bloomington kids were trying to follow that advice, but the stranger, none other than GRUBB, took offense. From the article:
"David Grubb, who got 212 votes in the 1998 GOP primary and who is a fixture of public comment periods at local government meetings, is charged with felony battery of a 5-year-old boy by hitting him on Sept. 23, 2005, after he and another boy refused to take candy from Grubb."
"The afternoon's testimony was anticlimactic, with a 7-year-old boy, two 14-year-old girls from across the street and two mothers who got involved testifying about the incident. The 5-year-old victim, now 6, was deemed too young to testify.
The 7-year-old boy said Grubb offered the two boys candy. When they refused, he said it was OK because he was Santa Claus, but they still refused. According to testimony, Grubb then took a swing at the 7-year-old. The boy ducked, and Grubb then hit the 5-year-old in the forehead, causing a bruise over his left eye.
The two girls across the street plus adult witness Michelle Ricardez said they saw Grubb swing at the boys. Ricardez, the girls and the 7-year-old boy all said they never heard anyone tease Grubb before or during the incident.
Baggerly said that Grubb never hit the boys but that they had been taunting him, and that the witnesses got together later to "close ranks" in their accounts. "
"The nation is at war and everything is in chaos," he told Harris outside the jury's presence. "I'm not sitting in front of a bunch of women. They're going to hang me, dang me ... I can be innocent and they will find me guilty."
Eh, at least he didn't blame gay marriage for his plight.
The trial continued today and is probably over now. We will follow this story as it develops.
UPDATE:
Actually it is over. Here's the headline:
Man convicted of battery
David Grubb could face a new felony intimidation charge for a remark he made to prosecutor Thursday at his trial for striking a 5-year-old boy who wouldn't take candy from him in September 2005
The article elaborates:
Finally:
"I love kids. I don't hit kids," he said. Except for one case, he began recounting, to Baggerly's dismay.
"I'm Santa Claus, damn it!" he said.
Recently the man himself has been in the news, as with a story in the June 8, 2006 edition of Bloomington's 'Herald-Times'. I can't link to it, because you have to be a subscriber, so I will just share some excerpts in a manner I hope is consistent with 'fair use'.
One of the most universal and fundamental pieces of advice old folks pass on to the kids is: 'don't take candy from strangers'. It seems some Bloomington kids were trying to follow that advice, but the stranger, none other than GRUBB, took offense. From the article:
"David Grubb, who got 212 votes in the 1998 GOP primary and who is a fixture of public comment periods at local government meetings, is charged with felony battery of a 5-year-old boy by hitting him on Sept. 23, 2005, after he and another boy refused to take candy from Grubb."
also...
"The afternoon's testimony was anticlimactic, with a 7-year-old boy, two 14-year-old girls from across the street and two mothers who got involved testifying about the incident. The 5-year-old victim, now 6, was deemed too young to testify.
The 7-year-old boy said Grubb offered the two boys candy. When they refused, he said it was OK because he was Santa Claus, but they still refused. According to testimony, Grubb then took a swing at the 7-year-old. The boy ducked, and Grubb then hit the 5-year-old in the forehead, causing a bruise over his left eye.
The two girls across the street plus adult witness Michelle Ricardez said they saw Grubb swing at the boys. Ricardez, the girls and the 7-year-old boy all said they never heard anyone tease Grubb before or during the incident.
Baggerly said that Grubb never hit the boys but that they had been taunting him, and that the witnesses got together later to "close ranks" in their accounts. "
For his part, Grubb evoked Roger Miller and borrowed a favorite tactic of his idol 'Pres Bush' in his comments:
"The nation is at war and everything is in chaos," he told Harris outside the jury's presence. "I'm not sitting in front of a bunch of women. They're going to hang me, dang me ... I can be innocent and they will find me guilty."
Eh, at least he didn't blame gay marriage for his plight.
UPDATE:
Actually it is over. Here's the headline:
Man convicted of battery
David Grubb could face a new felony intimidation charge for a remark he made to prosecutor Thursday at his trial for striking a 5-year-old boy who wouldn't take candy from him in September 2005
The article elaborates:
David Grubb hadn't even been convicted Thursday of felony battery of a 5-year-old child when his own remarks started police on paperwork for a second felony charge.
Grubb, in jail after being convicted of the battery, may face an intimidation charge for saying in court of prosecutor Lynda Robison, "I'd like to cut her throat."
and...
Grubb rambled at length about his life, jobs, feuds with public officials and problems with the law over the decades. Grubb is 67.
"I get run out of this county a lot because I see wrong, and I raise hell," he said. "I'm a little scattered, radical because I've had to fight for my life all my life."
One after another, he made allegations against people in the community, alive and dead, by name. He blamed many of his life's woes on "Democrats, idiots and queers."
Scratch what I said earlier. He did play the gay card.Finally:
"I love kids. I don't hit kids," he said. Except for one case, he began recounting, to Baggerly's dismay.
It was in 1962, and two boys were throwing hay out of his barn loft. Their dad was drunk at home, so he cut a maple branch, called them out and switched them. He said it got him hauled into court for battery, and "it cost me money," so he didn't hit kids after that.
As for whether he struck the 5-year-old boy on the forehead on Sept. 23, 2005, after the boy and a 6-year-old had refused to accept candy from him, even when he told them he was Santa Claus, he denied hitting the boy.
"I'm Santa Claus, damn it!" he said.
"Take me out behind a building and shoot me," Baggerly moaned during the jury break that followed.
Neither he nor his client will be shot, but sentencing will happen June 15, according to the article.
Sunday, May 21, 2006
No Irony
Here's a charming little photo that was in Bloomington's Herald Times this morning. The caption:
Lorraine Hensley, 18, sits between signs held by Alexis Hensley, 8, left, and Linda Jerome during a demonstration against illegal immigration Saturday near the Bartholomew County Memorial for Veterans in downtown Columbus. President Bush urged Congress on Saturday to find a middle ground between mass deportation or instant U.S. citizenship for the estimated 12 million illegal immigrants already living in America. Bush's radio message was the third time this week he has spoken out about immigration. Andrew Laker | Associated Press
I would consider it to be an A-OK use of my tax money to round up this lot and ship them back to where they came from. Probably that would be Lower Assclownia.
Not sure if these folks will achieve the fame of the 'Get a brain morans' guy, but they tried.
Follow up 06/06/06:
'LEMA_ODA' on has a great post on livejournal (wow, there's a phrase I neve imagined myself typing, 'a great post etc etc') about the 'NO AMNETY' photo, along with other anti-immigrant spelling bloopers. He notes:
On a personal note, i have now been to two very large immigrant rights protests at which there were thousands of mostly Hispanic immigrants for whom English is a second language and i have yet to see even one misspelled word on any of the English-language signs and banners they carried. 5/25/2006 12:08 AM
He also has a quote from the photographer who captured this comic moment:
Hi. This image was taken with a still camera, and the video on the web site was shot with a different camera. And how do I know that? I shot them both - that's how. Thanks everyone for the kind comments. It was a funny situation. The down side is that my poor editor has been inundated with phone calls from angry protesters.
Here's a link to that post: click.
Wednesday, May 17, 2006
I SULTE PRESBUSH
One thing this blog needs is some pictures. So, in order to add some images to this otherwise logocentric site, I bravely ventured into GRUBB COUTRY (sic) on Bloomington's industrial West side with my digital camera. Occasionally you will see Mr. GRUBB sitting out in front of his house, but he wasn't there today. He will never wave when you wave at him. He used to have a grey beard, but the beard is gone now.
One morning, on the way to work, I saw Coutry Commissioner GRUBB coming out his front door, followed by a very large TV. The TV sped up and passed him going down the front steps. He was laying flat on his back. The TV was laying screen down on the ground. I stopped the car and asked if he needed help. 'No, no' he said, and waved me off. He was able to get up and that was all the convincing I needed. I hopped in the car and sped off.
Just as Ol' Dirty Bastard once proclaimed 'Wu-Tang is for the children', so too is GRUBB concerned about the well-being of our young people. The truck used to say 'KIDS NO DRUGS' along with other slogans including 'THANKS REPS BLACKS DEMORATS (sic)' and 'POWELL AFTER BUSH'. Now it says 'KIDS KIDS KIDS KIDS KIDS'. KIDS what? I'm afraid to ask
Worth noting: the satellite dish. In related news, the number of homes without plumbing recently surprassed the number of homes without satellite TV.
Our last shot shows the truck from the other side. As you can see, still shaken by my previous visit, I was afraid to get out of the car to take these photos. I would be surprised if more than 3 of the people who graduated from IU this year ever saw GRUBB COUTRY in their 4 or more years in Bloomington. But like Skull Island, it's out there, with its own rules and logic, best left alone by those from the outside.
Sunday, May 07, 2006
Scenes from post-graduate life ca. 1990
Congratulations, graduates!
I graduated from college 16 years ago. W's Daddy was in office, and things were pretty bleak. He hadn't yet started that hoo-ha, let's feel good about ourselves war in the gulf yet, but plenty of people were graduating with seemingly not too bad degrees (various engineering disciplines) from not too bad schools (like Purdue, not too shabby in the technical area), yet getting fuck-all response to their job searches.
I was able to land something using some of the same pestering nerdly skills that had met with a 0% success rate in dealing with the opposite sex. Anyhow, they got sick of me calling and generally annoying them all the time, and gave me a job at what everybody called the 'Naval Air Welfare Center' in Indianapolis. It was about the only place I could think of where you could work in Indianapolis with a Physics degree, seeing as it involved creating and testing devices that could be used to kill people. It was where veterans and college grads with no self-esteem went to die. This dying process could take anywhere from 1 to 40 years, and involved such indignities as
So, enjoy your new jobs!
I graduated from college 16 years ago. W's Daddy was in office, and things were pretty bleak. He hadn't yet started that hoo-ha, let's feel good about ourselves war in the gulf yet, but plenty of people were graduating with seemingly not too bad degrees (various engineering disciplines) from not too bad schools (like Purdue, not too shabby in the technical area), yet getting fuck-all response to their job searches.
I was able to land something using some of the same pestering nerdly skills that had met with a 0% success rate in dealing with the opposite sex. Anyhow, they got sick of me calling and generally annoying them all the time, and gave me a job at what everybody called the 'Naval Air Welfare Center' in Indianapolis. It was about the only place I could think of where you could work in Indianapolis with a Physics degree, seeing as it involved creating and testing devices that could be used to kill people. It was where veterans and college grads with no self-esteem went to die. This dying process could take anywhere from 1 to 40 years, and involved such indignities as
- sitting in the cafeteria eating horrible, horrible food, listening to your Lovecraft-esque boss talk about his sex life with his wife
- listening to grown men talk for an hour about the merits of competing brands of lawnmowers
- listening to increasingly icky guy co-workers make lewd remarks about the women in the cafeteria
- watching the new boss, who had a body resembling a melted candle, pull a room-temperature (no microwaves available at the time) hot dog from his cooler every day as he ate lunch at his desk
So, enjoy your new jobs!
Thursday, May 04, 2006
They killed Mr. Softie
Here's some tired crap you hear a lot - it's one of those memes that people hear and pass on and on and on, without ever pausing to think about how fucking stupid they sound first off for repeating something verbatim which probably everybody has heard many times to begin with, secondly, for doing so in a complete mental vacuum in re: labor history:
Unions were fine organizations, 100 years ago. Back when the federal government was not addressing certain crucial labor issues, unions brought them into the public's view and created needed debate.
Today, however, unions do little but increase the costs of doing business. Sure, some select people benefit by earning more than they would otherwise get in a truly free market. But the majority suffers from higher prices and union corruption.
It's from here, but oh god it doesn't matter. Anyhow, I am on a mailing list for Techsunite.org. They have taken on the Quixotic task of getting techies to Unionize. Quixotic because among other things techies are anti-social creatures, so the whole getting together and organizing thing seems a bit absurd. Also because they are highly competitive, so the whole working for the common good thing seems a bit absurd. You could probably be a passable manager of techies just by insinuating to your various reports that 'employee X might do job Y better than you'. They would then bust their techie asses to prove you wrong. Anyhow.
Here's an article from a former Microsoftie, The WalMartization of Microsoft.
I left Microsoft to be a full-time parent to my newly adopted daughter in 2000. Since then, not only is the stock stagnant, but the wages and salaries are too. In fact, wages and salaries seem to have stagnated at the same time Microsoft hired a top Wal-Mart executive. That same executive has just been promoted to Chief Operating Officer.
Meanwhile, according to anonymous sources, managers at a recent Executive Retreat were encouraged to make everything like “Wal-Mart.” How deep will this exhortation go? Will wages continue to be stagnant and perhaps decline?
She goes on to reference Steve Ballmer's advice to fire 6.5% of your staff every year. That might actually please 'Who da'Punk', the individual behind Mini-Microsoft, a blog with this mission statement:
Let's slim down Microsoft into a lean, mean, efficient customer pleasing profit making machine! Mini-Microsoft, Mini-Microsoft, lean-and-mean!
Sounds good on paper, but who is he kidding? You can't go back to the garage. Once a company reaches a certain size, all it can do is hang on and make modest but safe gains, picking up new products by buying out little guys here and there, hopefully without accidentally destroying them with your hamfisted clumsy big fucking corporation hands, and eventually you just die. In the meantime, the blog is an interesting window into Microsoft, as many Microsoft type folks vent spleen within (here's the big revelation - middle management: not good!), and it's also a good source of Schadenfreude for Microsoft-bashers or maybe just people who wished they worked someplace of significance.
For the record, I actually like a lot of Microsoft products. XP, which I'm using now, SQL Server, I even think C# is pretty cool despite the Java resemblance. I got no personal beef with Microsoft. I'd get much more Schadenfreudic enjoyment seeing Oracle or Sun go down the toilet, actually. Larry Ellison's role in life seems to be making Steve Ballmer seem all cuddly and Care Bear like.
Unions were fine organizations, 100 years ago. Back when the federal government was not addressing certain crucial labor issues, unions brought them into the public's view and created needed debate.
Today, however, unions do little but increase the costs of doing business. Sure, some select people benefit by earning more than they would otherwise get in a truly free market. But the majority suffers from higher prices and union corruption.
It's from here, but oh god it doesn't matter. Anyhow, I am on a mailing list for Techsunite.org. They have taken on the Quixotic task of getting techies to Unionize. Quixotic because among other things techies are anti-social creatures, so the whole getting together and organizing thing seems a bit absurd. Also because they are highly competitive, so the whole working for the common good thing seems a bit absurd. You could probably be a passable manager of techies just by insinuating to your various reports that 'employee X might do job Y better than you'. They would then bust their techie asses to prove you wrong. Anyhow.
Here's an article from a former Microsoftie, The WalMartization of Microsoft.
I left Microsoft to be a full-time parent to my newly adopted daughter in 2000. Since then, not only is the stock stagnant, but the wages and salaries are too. In fact, wages and salaries seem to have stagnated at the same time Microsoft hired a top Wal-Mart executive. That same executive has just been promoted to Chief Operating Officer.
Meanwhile, according to anonymous sources, managers at a recent Executive Retreat were encouraged to make everything like “Wal-Mart.” How deep will this exhortation go? Will wages continue to be stagnant and perhaps decline?
She goes on to reference Steve Ballmer's advice to fire 6.5% of your staff every year. That might actually please 'Who da'Punk', the individual behind Mini-Microsoft, a blog with this mission statement:
Let's slim down Microsoft into a lean, mean, efficient customer pleasing profit making machine! Mini-Microsoft, Mini-Microsoft, lean-and-mean!
Sounds good on paper, but who is he kidding? You can't go back to the garage. Once a company reaches a certain size, all it can do is hang on and make modest but safe gains, picking up new products by buying out little guys here and there, hopefully without accidentally destroying them with your hamfisted clumsy big fucking corporation hands, and eventually you just die. In the meantime, the blog is an interesting window into Microsoft, as many Microsoft type folks vent spleen within (here's the big revelation - middle management: not good!), and it's also a good source of Schadenfreude for Microsoft-bashers or maybe just people who wished they worked someplace of significance.
For the record, I actually like a lot of Microsoft products. XP, which I'm using now, SQL Server, I even think C# is pretty cool despite the Java resemblance. I got no personal beef with Microsoft. I'd get much more Schadenfreudic enjoyment seeing Oracle or Sun go down the toilet, actually. Larry Ellison's role in life seems to be making Steve Ballmer seem all cuddly and Care Bear like.
Monday, May 01, 2006
A Series of Progressively More Painful Indignities
I recently read The Tortilla Curtain by T.C. Boyle, a book seemingly written for these times, and by these times I mean the times where the immigration debate is on everyone's mind, with immigrants even marching in Burlington, VT, of all places. Actually the book was written in 1995, and is set in California, which is usually ahead of the rest of the U.S. in things like popular music, fashion, drugs, and racism toward Mexicans (I visited L.A. back in the 80's, and what struck me the most was how all the white people would speak disapprovingly and condescendingly of racism toward African-Americans in Indiana, then turn around and rant about 'beans', apparently completely oblivious to the irony of the conversation's turn. But this was before Alanis Morrisette brought the concept of irony to the masses.)
The novel revolves around two couples, well-off white liberals Delaney and Kyra, and immigrants Candido and America, who live in a camp in Topanga Canyon not far from the white folks' gated community. The book opens with Delaney striking Candido with his car, and Candido and America suffer a series of progressively more painful indignities as the book progresses, while Delaney's liberal ideals slowly (and Kyra's less slowly) unravel under the influence of paranoid and decidedly creepy upper-class neighbors.
As I've mentioned before, I'm fascinated with Mexico and its culture, so I found the book very interesting independently of the timeliness of the subject matter, and it is definitely worth reading (as is the other T.C. Boyle novel I've read, Drop City, in which a hippie commune self-destructs in a highly interesting way, in Alaska, of all places). It will give the reader a better understanding of what immigrants have to deal with, although I suspect people clamoring to round up all the illegals and ship them South of the Border might not be too inclined to give this book a chance.
The novel revolves around two couples, well-off white liberals Delaney and Kyra, and immigrants Candido and America, who live in a camp in Topanga Canyon not far from the white folks' gated community. The book opens with Delaney striking Candido with his car, and Candido and America suffer a series of progressively more painful indignities as the book progresses, while Delaney's liberal ideals slowly (and Kyra's less slowly) unravel under the influence of paranoid and decidedly creepy upper-class neighbors.
As I've mentioned before, I'm fascinated with Mexico and its culture, so I found the book very interesting independently of the timeliness of the subject matter, and it is definitely worth reading (as is the other T.C. Boyle novel I've read, Drop City, in which a hippie commune self-destructs in a highly interesting way, in Alaska, of all places). It will give the reader a better understanding of what immigrants have to deal with, although I suspect people clamoring to round up all the illegals and ship them South of the Border might not be too inclined to give this book a chance.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)